You know, here I am, a little stressed because (and, maybe you don't already know this) writing a blog is intimidating. How can I be personable? I can't even imagine why anyone would want to read my thoughts on anything, even though I know I have a lot of valuable knowledge and wisdom to share. Or, even worse, they do and I'll just disappoint them because I'm not presenting an informative topic in an interesting or engaging way. My mind is spinning.
Yeah, I know... I'm a mess sometimes. Maybe even a lot of the time. I can hardly catch my breath with all these expectations and all these children. I have four (million) kids these days. But, I happen to know a little secret that sometimes I also forget.
Breathing is absolutely the most important thing you never think about.
When I think about it in this moment, I can feel it in my throat; this shallow breath that leaves me feeling a bit dissatisfied and wanting more. It doesn't have to be this way though. It's just a message my body is sending me to get my attention; a little red flag. So, I put my musings away and decide to do a quick reset. Hold on, I'll be right back.
Ahhh, that's better. So, why do I need to think about the way I'm breathing?
Your breath can be a touchstone. It is the simultaneously the most basic and powerful tool we have in bridging your body, mind, and spirit. It works though the vagus nerve. Simply put, your breath is the bridge that connects your body and your thoughts. It effects every cell of your body and, as an extension, your baby's cells. How powerful is that?!
We've all heard someone say, "Calm down, just take a deep breath", right? Like it's always that easy... Hmfph. It can be pretty annoying and unhelpful. That's because it's not just THAT you breathe, it's the WAY you breathe. You see, as humans we have two modes. And, the way you breathe works exactly like a remote control only for your nervous system not for your TV.
Maybe I didn't spell it out in technical terms for you but the way you breathe has the ability to determine whether you're in a "fight or flight" response OR a "rest and digest", "tend and befriend" response. Now, I don't know about you, but as a woman, mom, partner and friend, I much prefer being in a calm and nurturing state. Now, don't get me wrong, the "fight and flight" response is super important. It can be helpful when you're facing true danger (like saving your kid from on-coming traffic, for example). But, I promise, you're already plenty accomplished in that mode. The culture we live in tends to bring out a constant state of "fight or flight". You definitely don't need any more practice with it. I promise.
So, how do you know if you're doing it right? That's a good question and you'll get plenty of different answers from almost everyone you ask. Yoga instructors, birth educators, and meditation instructors all can have barring opinions about what they think works and what doesn't. If their method work for you, GREAT! If not, that's okay, too. Don't beat yourself up or get stuck in any particular method, please. But, one way to know you're doing it right is if you are even trying. As I like to say, done is better than perfect. With that said, there are some general guidelines to follow to make sure that, as a pregnant person, you are getting the most out of your breath.
So, let's give it a try!
Very basically, it's in through the nose and out through the mouth. Going a bit deeper, you can bring awareness to your body, and taking note of the pattern of your current breath, any areas of tension or stress in your body, the position your body is in, and the activity in which you're currently involved.
Once you've noticed that, exhale fully. As you take air in through your nose, simply imagine your next three breaths (or more if you feel so moved) are filling you abdomen, expanding the sides of your ribs, and going so far down as to reach your sweet baby in your belly.
Try breathing in for a count of four if you can but keep in mind that there are many factors may that effect your ability to breathe deeply including your hydration, iron, and progesterone levels - not to mention the placement and/or size of your baby. Then simply releasing, preferably through the mouth, while trying to double the amount of time you spent inhaling.
As you begin on this path, you will be practicing. You might not notice the benefits right away. That's okay! Just don't stop trying. Mindful breathing can bring you into the present moment, and into the fullness of your body. You will encode memories and emotions with your in-breath and release your stress and tension with your out breath.